Welcome to the real world!

"How the hell did you get this job?" - that's the most common thought that crosses my mind every single day when I am at work.

The amount of incompetent people a normal human being has to work with is not just scary or entertaining, it's simply ludicrous. All those people who are adamant that they deserve way better jobs that they can get or will ever be able to get, will do everything they can to make your life miserable. Sometimes I just hope that they do it deliberately and out of jealousy, but then I realise that unfortunately they do not even understand how much trouble and misery they cause. 

So say you are a customer assistant in a call centre. Say you work for a government and you help people to sort their benefits out. You work from 9-5 and you must serve up to 8 clients an hour. You can spend 5 to 10 minutes on a customer, but you must be extremely efficient, because everyone has its own targets and it would be nice to deliver. That's what a normal human being would think, but not my favourite beyond the hope creature. 

For some strange reason, at one point, either because of their despair or just due to natural degradation, these people decide that it's their duty to do their job as if it's their first day and they have no understanding what they are doing at all. 

In 6 cases out of 10, when you want to make a new benefit claim, you will end up with this type of conversations:

- Hello, I would like to make a new claim for Income Support (IS) on the basis of being a full-time carer for a severely disabled person. I am 60 y.o., my name is X and Y, and I am caring for my 13 y.o. daughter, who is in receipt of highest care DLA. - That's all you need to get IS. 

- So you want to make a claim for IS? 

- Yes, I do.

- So what is your name? 

- X and Y.

- I will need to ask you a couple of questions, before I can process your claim. Is that fine?

-Yes.

- Have you been looking for work since you last claim? 

- No, I am a single parent of a 13 y.o. child. Before that I was also getting IS, but on the ground of being a single parent. My claim was suspended and due to your administrative error it was closed. I do not want to waste further 3-4 months to investigate the case, I better make a new claim. - Anyone who is working in this sector will automatically understand that this lady is getting Child Benefit and Child Tax Credit. You only need one brain cell to get it. 

- I understand. But I need to ask you all the questions that are in the form before I can process your claim. So why you have not been looking for work?

- Because I was a full-time carer!!!

- Is anyone in your household sick?

- I've already told you that I am caring for my severely disabled daughter and I live with her. 

- I understand. But I just need to ask you the questions... What's the name of your daughter?

- W and Y.

- Are you caring for someone?

- WTF?!

- I just need to ask you questions.

- WTF?

- Are you in receipt of Child Tax Credit or Working Tax Credit? - As the name clearly suggests you can only get WTC if you are in paid work. 

- Yes, I've already told you. 

- So which one do you get?

- WTF???!!!

One would think that I am exaggerating and this conversation had never taken place. But it happened to me and it was in the 21st century, and it took me 40 minutes to make a claim for my client. It should have taken 10 minutes maximum, because all the information the customer assistant needed was given to her within the 1st minute. But she had to go through all the questions, because she was lacking that vital one brain cell that would have allowed her to figure it out herself!  

Welcome to the real world, guys! This is how it works.